Gratitude depends on memory-- a French Proverb thus put it. I had it in my thoughts as I tried this long walk home. There was that bus to catch, no question about it. But it was inevitable I suppose that I should take to this pretty paved walk back to that rented room in a new flat. It was also fated that today I should ask myself, who do I have to thank for all this beauty? And who do I share it with, alone in this strange land?
I believe I needed it most—a grateful heart. When did I lose it? How did I lose it? Thanksgiving -- it could well be the much needed key to unlock the fullness of my sometimes all-too-closed life. Could it turn what little I have into enough ? Or maybe more? My denials into acceptance? My chaos into order? Could it transform my despair into joy? Turn this poor man's meal into a feast, that stranger into a friend?
People -- they get broken and then avoid making sense of it all. Not me. I want to know. I need to know. And I wish that by giving thanks here, today to something, someone bigger than all these randomness-- I could help me make sense of my past, embrace peace for today. And who knows, I may even get really all excited, step into a world of wonder and really, finally, break through.